Dr. Lee's Blog

I spend the majority of my working day speaking with and counseling people about ways to deal with those physical parts of themselves that bother them. I don't view this as frivolous; there are things that can really make one feel bad with every glance in the mirror or attempt to button clothes. It's different for each person, but most of us have something we don't like to have to deal with every day. Well, I share in that concern. For awhile, my neck has grown heavier as I, indeed have gained weight. I know full well that the two are connected, and I basically have, over the past few years, put the appearance of my neck in the category of "eventually you will lose some weight and the neck will get better." I did not think about my neck all day, and maybe not even several times a day...but certainly every day, at least once a day. But most of the time I was able to ignore it. Although it has been years since I wanted to let my husband take my picture. And he really loves photography AND thinks I am fabulous and silly for refusing photographs. For several years, I avoided being in pictures, concentrated on my eyes and lips when I looked in the mirror, liked my strong eyebrows because they would "draw the eye up from my wobbly chin." I got by.

Then I started a television gig. We all know what the TV camera does....10 lbs? Hah! For awhile, I did my eyes and lips really carefully and artfully. But mostly, I closed my eyes when I watched my recordings and listened to what I had to say. I sounded smart and savvy and professional and trustworthy. If I did not look perfect, it was ok because it made me approachable. Prospective patients would be comfortable coming to me because I was not going to sit in judgement of their "less than perfection" because I was not ideally shaped. And patients have responded to me as a trustworthy source of information. And quite a few have mentioned that they "want to look fabulous" just like me....Huh? People think I look fabulous.....Ok, I guess, but what are they looking at? Did they not see my neck?

For many months, things went along like this, I avoided feeling bad by not looking. I paid attention to how people in both my personal and private life responded to me and tried to see myself through their eyes. I am really lucky to have great friends and family and patients who think I am fabulous and smart and kind and capable and trustworthy and loveable so if I avoided seeing myself in the mirror or on TV, I was fine. I started working with Clark Russell of Clark Russell Salon and he styled me for my shows and told me I looked fabulous, and he must know, right? After all, it's his job.

And yet, the balance shifted and I reached the point where my neck started to affect how I felt about myself. What happened.....